Pam is an alcoholic. She lost her job. She’s often rude. She embarrasses her daughter. Her trailer is a mess.
And somehow, you root for her.
You want the bus route restored so she has purpose again. You gift her a pale ale and hope she’s doing okay. You understand why Penny stays despite the frustration.
This is the alchemy of character writing: making flawed people feel worthy of empathy, not despite their flaws but through them.
Let’s explore how imperfection creates relatability, and how struggle generates sympathy.
The Perfect Character Problem
Why Perfection Fails:
Perfect characters are:
- Unrelatable (no one is perfect)
- Uninteresting (no internal conflict)
- Unbelievable (violates lived experience)
- Unsympathetic (nothing to overcome)
Example of failure: Mary Sue/Gary Stu characters
- Good at everything
- Everyone loves them
- No meaningful struggles
- Audience resents them
Why we resent them: They highlight our inadequacies without offering connection points.
Flawed Characters Are Relatable Characters
Because we are all:
- Making mistakes
- Struggling with bad habits
- Falling short of our ideals
- Trying and failing and trying again
When characters mirror this, we recognize ourselves.
The Difference Between Flawed and Irredeemable
Not all flaws create sympathy. Some create revulsion.
The Line:
Flawed (sympathetic):
- Makes mistakes
- Hurts people (but not sadistically)
- Struggles with demons
- Tries (even if failing)
- Has redeeming qualities
Irredeemable (unsympathetic):
- Deliberately cruel without cause
- No attempt to improve
- Harms without remorse
- No redeeming qualities
- Audience sees no path forward
The distinction: Effort and humanity.
Pam: Flawed, Not Irredeemable
Her flaws:
- Alcoholism
- Sometimes mean to Penny
- Defensive and prideful
- Irresponsible at times
Her redeeming qualities:
- Loves Penny fiercely
- Lost job devastated her (she wants purpose)
- Grateful when bus route restored (tries to be better)
- Protective of her daughter despite failings
Result: Flawed person doing her best with limited tools.
Sympathy Through Struggle, Not Perfection
The Formula:
Sympathy = Effort + Obstacles + Humanity
Not success. Not perfection. Trying.
Why We Root for Pam:
1. We see her trying
- She drives the bus when route restored
- She shows up despite depression
- She cares about Penny even when poorly expressed
2. We understand obstacles
- Alcoholism is disease, not moral failing
- Economic hardship (lost job)
- Limited support system
3. We see her humanity
- She’s not just “the drunk”
- She’s a woman who lost purpose and copes poorly
- We’ve all coped poorly at some point
Sympathy comes from recognition: “I could have ended up there.”
The Technique: Contextualizing the Flaw
Bad Character Writing:
“She’s an alcoholic.” (End of characterization)
Good Character Writing:
Why is she an alcoholic?
- Lost her job (identity crisis)
- Economic struggle (stress)
- Single parent (overwhelm)
- Limited opportunities in small town (hopelessness)
How does it manifest?
- Drinks at saloon (social, not hiding)
- Defensive when confronted (shame)
- Sometimes mean (pain lashing out)
What’s underneath?
- Fear of worthlessness
- Love for daughter
- Desire for purpose
Result: The flaw has context. It’s not random—it’s understandable.
Flawed Characters in Stardew Valley
Shane: The Grump
Flaw: Rude, alcoholic, pushes people away
Context:
- Lost best friends (trauma)
- Survivor’s guilt
- Dead-end job
- Suicidal depression
Redeeming qualities:
- Cares for Jas deeply
- Gets therapy (tries)
- Loves chickens (shows capacity for care)
- Opens up slowly (trusts eventually)
Why we root for him: His rudeness is pain. His drinking is self-medication. His journey is recovery.
Haley: The Shallow Girl
Flaw: Vain, dismissive, rude when you meet her
Context:
- Parents always traveling (neglect/loneliness)
- Younger than she seems (still figuring out who she is)
- Uses appearance as armor (insecurity)
Redeeming qualities:
- Genuinely cares about Emily
- Photography passion (real interest)
- Grows significantly (character arc)
- Shows vulnerability eventually
Why we root for her: The shallow exterior hides real person finding herself.
Demetrius: The Awkward Stepdad
Flaw: Prioritizes Maru over Sebastian, emotionally distant
Context:
- Scientist (literally thinks differently)
- Trying but bad at stepparenting
- Loves Robin and Maru (not malicious)
Redeeming qualities:
- Works hard
- Cares about family (just poorly expressed)
- Not intentionally hurtful
Why it’s sympathetic: Being bad at relationships is relatable. He’s trying.
Creating Sympathy: Techniques
1. Show the Wound Beneath the Flaw
Flaw is symptom. Wound is cause.
Pam drinks because:
- She lost her identity (bus driver)
- She feels worthless
- She’s in pain
The wound generates sympathy. The flaw is just how it manifests.
2. Give Them Moments of Grace
Even flawed people have good days.
Examples:
- Pam is grateful when bus route restored
- Shane smiles when talking about chickens
- George softens toward you eventually
These moments show: This person is more than their worst self.
3. Let Them Love Someone
Nothing humanizes faster than showing who they care about.
Pam loves Penny. It’s imperfect love, but it’s real.
Shane loves Jas. He stays alive for her.
George loves Evelyn. Their marriage is genuine.
Love creates sympathy even when the person is otherwise difficult.
4. Show Them Trying (Even If Failing)
Effort matters more than success.
Pam:
- Shows up to work (even when struggling)
- Cares about daughter (even when it doesn’t land right)
Shane:
- Goes to therapy
- Attends support group
- Tries to drink less (doesn’t always succeed)
The trying is what we root for.
5. Make the Flaw Relatable
We’ve all:
- Been rude when we’re hurting
- Used substances to cope
- Pushed people away
- Failed at what we intended
When characters do these things, we recognize ourselves.
This is empathy through imperfection.
When Flaws Don’t Work
Flaws fail to create sympathy when:
1. They’re consequence-free
- Character is mean but everyone loves them anyway
- Flaw doesn’t impact relationships
- No accountability
2. They’re excused rather than explored
- “That’s just how they are”
- No growth attempted
- Flaw is played for laughs
3. They harm sympathetic characters without remorse
- Abuse presented as quirky
- Victims dismissed
- No acknowledgment of pain caused
Example of failure:
If Pam were abusive to Penny and it was played as “tough love” → Audience would hate her, not sympathize
Why Stardew avoids this: Pam’s frustration with Penny is shown as her own pain, not Penny’s flaw. Penny is allowed to be hurt. We see both perspectives.
The Complexity Spectrum
One-Dimensional (Bad): “The alcoholic” (just a type)
Two-Dimensional (Better): “The alcoholic who lost her job” (type + context)
Three-Dimensional (Good): “The woman who lost her purpose, copes with alcohol, loves her daughter imperfectly, wants to be better, struggles daily” (person)
Stardew characters exist in three dimensions.
The Redemption Question
Do flawed characters need redemption arcs?
Not necessarily.
Sometimes characters:
- Improve gradually (Shane)
- Stay complicated (Pam)
- Don’t change much (George mellows but is still grumpy)
The point isn’t redemption—it’s humanity.
We don’t root for Pam because she becomes perfect.
We root for her because she’s trying to survive with the tools she has.
And that’s enough.
Why We Love the Town Drunk
Because:
- She’s broken but not defeated
- She loves imperfectly but genuinely
- She tries even when failing
- She has context for her struggles
- She’s more than her worst moments
And fundamentally:
Because she reflects something real about being human.
We’ve all been Pam at some point.
Maybe not with alcohol. Maybe with food, work, relationships, anger, fear.
But we’ve all coped poorly with pain.
And when we see a character doing the same, struggling but trying, flawed but human…
We don’t just sympathize.
We recognize.
And recognition creates the deepest form of story magic:
Feeling seen.
Practical Takeaway
To create flawed characters people root for:
1. Identify the flaw
- What’s the problematic behavior?
2. Find the wound
- Why does this flaw exist?
- What pain creates it?
3. Show the humanity
- Who do they love?
- What do they care about?
- When are they at their best?
4. Let them try
- Effort, even failed effort
- Small attempts at improvement
- Struggling forward
5. Create consequences
- Flaws affect relationships
- Characters face their impact
- Accountability exists
6. Avoid excusing
- Don’t justify bad behavior
- Show it as struggle, not quirk
- Let other characters be hurt
7. Make it relatable
- We’ve all struggled
- We’ve all failed
- We’ve all tried to be better
The formula:
Flaw + Context + Humanity + Effort = Sympathy
Not perfection.
Just people, doing their flawed, struggling, human best.
That’s who we root for.
Because that’s who we are.
Next: NPCs with Lives Beyond You - They exist when you’re not looking