I landed my dream job at a top tech company.
Six figures. Stock options. Free lunch. The works.
I spent two years grinding LeetCode problems, perfecting my resume, practicing system design interviews. I was convinced that once I got this job, I’d finally be happy.
For about three weeks after I got the offer, I was ecstatic. I couldn’t stop smiling. I told everyone. I posted on LinkedIn (yes, really). This was it. I’d made it.
Six months later, I was stressed about getting promoted to Senior. The salary that seemed incredible was now just “normal.” The free lunch was just lunch. And I found myself thinking: “Maybe if I get to Staff Engineer, THEN I’ll be satisfied.”
Welcome to the hedonic treadmill. And once you understand it, you can never unsee it.
What is the Hedonic Treadmill?
The hedonic treadmill (also called hedonic adaptation) is the psychological phenomenon where humans quickly return to a relatively stable level of happiness despite major positive or negative life changes.
The basic pattern:
- Something amazing happens (promotion, new relationship, big achievement)
- You experience a spike in happiness
- You rapidly adapt to the new situation
- You return to your baseline level of happiness
- You need something even bigger to feel that spike again
It’s called a “treadmill” because you’re constantly running toward happiness, but never actually getting anywhere. You keep achieving goals, but the satisfaction keeps slipping away.
The concept was first formally described by psychologists Philip Brickman and Donald Campbell in 1971, but the idea has been around for millennia. The Stoic philosophers talked about it. Buddhist teachings center around it. Now modern psychology has quantified it.
The Science Behind It
Here’s the uncomfortable truth from research:
Lottery winners and paraplegics return to similar happiness levels within a year.
Brickman’s famous 1978 study compared three groups:
- Recent lottery winners (average winnings: $400,000+)
- Recent accident victims who became paraplegic
- Control group (no major life change)
Results after one year:
- Lottery winners: Slightly happier than before, but not significantly
- Accident victims: Slightly less happy, but not as much as expected
- Control group: About the same
Both groups adapted. The lottery winners got used to being rich. The accident victims got used to their new circumstances. Both returned close to their baseline happiness.
This isn’t isolated. Study after study confirms it:
- Getting married increases happiness for about 2 years, then you return to baseline
- Salary increases boost happiness for 6-12 months, then adaptation kicks in
- Buying your dream house feels amazing for a few months, then it’s just home
- New tech gadgets excite you for weeks, then they’re just tools
The pattern holds across almost all positive life changes.
Why Our Brains Do This
From an evolutionary perspective, hedonic adaptation makes sense.
Imagine our ancestors:
“Wow, we found a cave! This is amazing! We’re so lucky!”
If they stayed perpetually satisfied with their cave, they’d never:
- Look for better shelter
- Improve their situation
- Adapt to changing threats
- Compete for resources
Dissatisfaction drives improvement. Contentment can lead to complacency.
Our brains are wired to:
- Quickly adapt to positive changes (so we keep striving)
- Constantly seek more (to improve survival odds)
- Compare ourselves to our peers (for competitive advantage)
This was great for survival in the ancestral environment. It’s terrible for happiness in modern life.
Real-World Examples from Tech
Let me walk you through how this plays out in the tech world, because I’ve lived it and watched countless others go through the same cycle.
Example 1: The Promotion Treadmill
The pattern I’ve seen (and experienced):
Junior Developer: “If I could just become a Mid-level Developer, I’d be so happy. That salary increase would change everything.”
Gets promoted
Mid-level Developer (3 months later): “The title is nice, but Senior Developers get more respect. If I could just hit Senior, I’d feel accomplished.”
Gets promoted
Senior Developer (3 months later): “Okay, but Staff Engineers are where the real influence is. They get to make architectural decisions. That’s what I need.”
Gets promoted
Staff Engineer (3 months later): “Principal Engineers have even more impact. They influence entire organizations. Maybe that’s the level where I’ll finally feel satisfied.”
I watched a coworker go through this exact progression over 5 years. He’s now a Principal Engineer at a FAANG company. His happiness level? About the same as when he was a Junior Developer, except now he has different stressors.
The treadmill: Each promotion feels meaningful for weeks, then becomes the new normal. The goalposts keep moving.
Example 2: The Startup Exit Fantasy
I know a founder who sold his startup for $8 million.
Pre-exit: “If I could just exit for $5M, I’d retire and be happy forever. I’d travel, work on passion projects, never stress about money again.”
Immediately post-exit: Euphoria. Quit immediately. Traveled to Bali. Posted “living the dream” on Instagram.
6 months post-exit: Restless. Started comparing himself to founders who exited for $50M. Feeling like his exit was “small” compared to his peers.
12 months post-exit: Started a new company. Back to 80-hour weeks and stress. But now convinced that THIS exit will be the $50M one that brings lasting happiness.
The reality: The happiness from exiting lasted less time than he spent building the company. He adapted to having $8M the same way most people adapt to a salary increase.
Example 3: The FAANG Dream
When I finally got into a FAANG company (after years of trying), here’s how my happiness evolved:
Week 1: “Holy shit, I did it! I’m a FAANG engineer! My parents are so proud. Everyone at my old company is impressed. This is incredible.”
Month 1: “The onboarding is smooth. The codebase is impressive. My team is smart. The perks are amazing. I made the right choice.”
Month 3: “The free lunch is convenient, but I’m getting tired of the same options. The codebase is actually pretty messy in some areas. Some people aren’t that impressive.”
Month 6: “This is just a job. The bureaucracy is frustrating. The projects move slowly. The compensation is good, but I’m already thinking about my next refresh. Maybe I should interview at [other FAANG company].”
The adaptation: What seemed like the pinnacle of success became just “work” faster than I ever imagined.
Example 4: The Remote Work Revelation
During COVID, everyone suddenly got what they’d been asking for: remote work.
The Initial Reaction: “This is amazing! No commute! Work from anywhere! I can spend more time with family! This is the future!”
6 Months Later: “Actually, remote work is isolating. I miss the casual conversations. The work-life boundaries are blurred. I’m working MORE hours than before.”
Now: Many people who fought for remote work are now looking for hybrid or in-office roles. They adapted to remote work, and the initial euphoria wore off.
The hedonic treadmill doesn’t care what you think you want. It’ll adapt you to it anyway.
Example 5: The Salary Progression Paradox
I tracked my own happiness versus salary over a decade:
2014: $50k → Happiness: 6/10 → "If I could just make $75k..."
2016: $80k → Happiness: 6/10 → "If I could just hit $100k..."
2018: $120k → Happiness: 6/10 → "If I could just get to $150k..."
2020: $180k → Happiness: 6/10 → "If I could just break $200k..."
2023: $250k → Happiness: 6/10 → "If I could just reach $300k..."
My expenses scaled with my income. My lifestyle expectations scaled with my income. My peer comparison group scaled with my income.
The only thing that didn’t scale? My actual day-to-day happiness.
At $250k, I worry about money about as much as I did at $50k. I just worry about different things (portfolio performance vs. rent payment).
Why the Hedonic Treadmill is Particularly Brutal in Tech
The tech industry is perfectly designed to accelerate the hedonic treadmill:
1. Constant Comparison
Tech culture is obsessed with levels, compensation, and status:
- “What level are you?”
- “What’s your TC?” (Total Compensation)
- “Which company?”
- “What’s your offer from [prestigious company]?”
Every Slack community, Discord server, and Blind thread reinforces that you should always be chasing more.
You’re never just successful. You’re always positioned relative to others.
2. Transparent Compensation
Sites like Levels.fyi make it trivially easy to see that someone at your level, at another company, makes $50k more than you.
Before these sites existed, you could be happy with your salary. Now, you know exactly where you stand in the distribution. And if you’re not in the top 10%, your brain interprets that as “falling behind.”
The effect: Even objectively high salaries feel inadequate when you can instantly compare them to higher ones.
3. The Prestige Hierarchy
Not all companies are equal in the tech status game:
- Startup → “You should aim for FAANG”
- FAANG → “You should aim for a hot startup”
- Hot startup → “You should start your own”
- Started your own → “You should raise a Series A”
- Raised Series A → “You should get to Series B”
- Successful exit → “You should exit bigger next time”
There’s always a higher tier. Always someone doing “better.” Always a reason your achievement isn’t quite enough.
4. The Growth Mindset Trap
Tech culture celebrates “continuous improvement” and “always be learning.”
This is generally good! But it can also mean you never feel allowed to be satisfied with where you are.
- Shipped a successful feature? “What’s next?”
- Launched a product? “How do we 10x it?”
- Hit a goal? “Let’s set a stretch goal.”
The unintended consequence: You’re always future-focused, never present-satisfied.
5. The “Just Ship It” Culture
Tech moves fast. Yesterday’s achievement is today’s baseline is tomorrow’s legacy code.
You pour your heart into a feature. It launches. It’s successful! And within a week, it’s just… part of the product. Old news. What’s the next thing?
The rapid pace means adaptation happens even faster.
The Dark Side: When the Treadmill Breaks You
For some people, the hedonic treadmill doesn’t just lead to mild dissatisfaction. It leads to burnout, depression, and questioning everything.
Burnout from Endless Chasing
I’ve seen brilliant engineers burn out not from the work itself, but from the psychological exhaustion of never feeling “there yet.”
The cycle:
- Work 60-hour weeks to get promoted
- Get promoted
- Feel good for a week
- Realize Senior Engineers work 60-hour weeks too
- Keep grinding because “maybe at the next level…”
Eventually: You’re exhausted, cynical, and wondering why you’re doing any of this.
The Quarter-Life/Mid-Life Crisis Version
“I achieved everything I said I wanted. Why don’t I feel fulfilled?”
This is devastatingly common in tech, especially for people who hit their career goals early.
- Got into MIT ✓
- Joined a top startup ✓
- Made $300k ✓
- Bought a nice house ✓
“Now what? Why am I not happy? Is something wrong with me?”
The answer: Nothing is wrong with you. Your brain adapted to your success. The hedonic treadmill is functioning exactly as designed.
The Comparison Trap Death Spiral
When you tie your happiness to external achievements, and those achievements stop providing happiness, you start comparing even more desperately.
“Maybe I’m not happy because I’m not ENOUGH successful. If I were at Google instead of a startup… if I had exited for $50M instead of $8M… if I were a VP instead of a Director…”
This is a death spiral. More achievement won’t fix it. Because the problem isn’t your achievement level—it’s that you’re on a treadmill.
How to Get Off the Hedonic Treadmill
Okay, enough doom and gloom. Here’s the good news: You can’t stop hedonic adaptation, but you can work with it instead of against it.
Strategy 1: Understand the Baseline
Reframe your thinking:
Your baseline happiness isn’t determined by your achievements. It’s determined by:
- Your temperament (partly genetic)
- Your daily habits
- Your relationships
- Your sense of meaning
- Your health (physical and mental)
The implications:
A Senior Engineer with strong relationships, good health, meaningful work, and contentment practices will be happier than a stressed-out Principal Engineer with a bad marriage, poor health, and constant comparison.
The level matters less than how you experience the level.
Strategy 2: The Gratitude Practice (That Actually Works)
I used to roll my eyes at “gratitude practices.” They seemed like woo-woo nonsense.
Then I tried one that’s backed by research, and it actually worked.
The technique: Gratitude journaling (but specific)
Every evening, write down three things that happened that day that you’re grateful for.
The key: Be SPECIFIC, not generic.
Bad gratitude:
- “I’m grateful for my health”
- “I’m grateful for my job”
- “I’m grateful for my family”
Good gratitude:
- “I’m grateful that the code review today led to a really interesting discussion about architecture tradeoffs”
- “I’m grateful that my manager gave me direct feedback that helped me improve my presentation”
- “I’m grateful that I got to pair program with Alex today and learned a new debugging technique”
Why this works: It forces you to actively notice positive experiences instead of letting them fade into the adapted background.
My experience: After 30 days, I noticed I was actively looking for things to be grateful for during my day. It slowed down adaptation by keeping positive experiences salient.
Strategy 3: The “Enough” Exercise
Naval Ravikant talks about defining your “enough.”
The practice:
Write down your answer to: “What would be enough?”
Not: “When would you be satisfied forever?”
But: “What would be enough that you could stop chasing and start enjoying?”
My version:
Financial enough: $2M net worth (can cover family needs with safe withdrawal rate)
Career enough: Senior Engineer at a respected company, working on meaningful problems
Lifestyle enough: 3-bedroom house, reliable car, can afford hobbies and travel
Recognition enough: Respected by people I respect; not famous or widely known
The discipline: When you hit “enough,” practice staying there instead of immediately raising the bar.
This doesn’t mean no growth. It means growth from curiosity, not from inadequacy.
Strategy 4: Process Over Outcomes
Here’s a mind shift that helped me:
Old mindset: “I’ll be happy when I achieve X.”
New mindset: “I want to be the kind of person who finds joy in the process of working toward X.”
Example:
Old: “I’ll be happy when I get promoted to Staff.”
New: “I want to enjoy the process of developing Staff-level skills: deep technical design, mentoring others, driving alignment. Whether or not I get the title, I want to enjoy this growth.”
The difference: The outcome still matters, but it’s not holding your happiness hostage.
When you enjoy the process, you’re happy during the journey. When you finally hit the outcome, it’s a bonus, not the sole source of satisfaction.
Strategy 5: The Anti-Comparison Framework
Comparison is the fastest way to speed up the hedonic treadmill.
The framework:
1. Identify your comparison triggers
Where do you compare yourself to others?
- LinkedIn promotions
- Levels.fyi
- Peer conversations about compensation
- Tech conference speakers
- Twitter tech influencers
2. Limit exposure (seriously)
I unfollowed everyone on LinkedIn who made me feel inadequate. I stopped checking Levels.fyi. I left Blind.
The result: My comparison rate dropped dramatically. My baseline happiness increased.
3. Reframe necessary comparisons
When comparison is unavoidable, reframe it:
- ❌ “They’re at Staff and I’m at Senior. I’m behind.”
- ✅ “They’re at Staff. That’s interesting. What path did they take? Could I learn from that?”
Turn comparison into curiosity, not competition.
Strategy 6: The Savoring Practice
The problem: You achieve something, feel good for a day, then immediately move on.
The solution: Deliberately extend the positive experience.
How to savor:
When something good happens (promotion, successful project, positive feedback):
1. Share it with someone who cares (within 48 hours) Don’t just internally acknowledge it. Tell someone. Let them celebrate with you. Hear yourself describe it.
2. Write about it Journal the experience. What happened? How did it feel? What made it meaningful?
3. Reflect on the path What did you do to get here? What obstacles did you overcome? Who helped you?
4. Plan a celebration Mark the achievement with something tangible. Dinner with friends. A small purchase. A day off. Something that creates a memory.
Why this works: You’re deliberately slowing down adaptation by keeping the experience active in your mind.
Example:
When I hit Senior Engineer, I:
- Took my wife to a nice dinner and told her the full story
- Wrote a long reflection on what I learned during the journey
- Bought myself a nice mechanical keyboard (tied to the achievement)
- Took the next Friday off to just enjoy the moment
That promotion satisfaction lasted 3 months instead of 3 days.
Strategy 7: The Hedonic Portfolio
Don’t put all your happiness eggs in one basket.
The mistake: Tying all your happiness to career progression.
When career is your only source of fulfillment, you’re maximally vulnerable to the hedonic treadmill. You’ll keep chasing bigger career achievements because they’re your only lever.
The alternative: Build a portfolio of fulfillment sources
- Career: Meaningful work, skill development, impact
- Relationships: Deep friendships, romantic partnership, family
- Health: Physical fitness, mental wellness, energy
- Hobbies: Creative outlets, sports, learning for fun
- Community: Contributing to something larger than yourself
- Nature: Regular time outdoors, disconnected from tech
The effect: When career achievements adapt away (and they will), you still have other sources of satisfaction.
When I started rock climbing (hobby) and volunteering (community), my happiness became less dependent on my next promotion. I had multiple sources of fulfillment instead of one.
Strategy 8: The Reverse Bucket List
Traditional bucket list: Things you want to do/achieve in the future.
Reverse bucket list: Things you’ve ALREADY done/achieved.
The practice: Make a list of everything you’ve accomplished, experienced, learned, and survived.
Mine includes:
- Learned to code from scratch
- Shipped products used by thousands of people
- Survived multiple layoffs
- Built systems that handled 1M+ requests/day
- Mentored junior developers
- Gave conference talks (and bombed some)
- Started a side project that failed
- Got rejected from 50+ companies
- Eventually joined a company I admired
- Made technical decisions I’m proud of
- Wrote code that’s still running years later
Why this works: It counteracts the treadmill’s forward-focused nature. You’re reminding yourself that you’ve ALREADY accomplished meaningful things.
Update it monthly. Keep adding. Keep recognizing. Keep appreciating.
The Paradox: Success Doesn’t Make You Happy, But Failure Makes You Unhappy
Here’s the nuanced truth:
Achieving success doesn’t permanently increase happiness (hedonic treadmill).
But chronic failure, lack of progress, and unmet basic needs DO cause lasting unhappiness.
It’s asymmetric.
- Getting promoted to Senior doesn’t make you permanently happier
- But being stuck at Junior for 10 years while watching peers advance will make you unhappy
- Making $200k doesn’t make you permanently happier
- But struggling to afford rent and food causes chronic stress
The implication: You can’t chase your way to happiness through achievement. But you CAN remove obstacles to happiness by meeting your basic needs and making reasonable progress.
The balance:
- Pursue career growth and financial stability (to remove barriers to happiness)
- Don’t expect career growth and financial gains to CREATE lasting happiness
- Find happiness in the process, relationships, and practices independent of achievement
The Final Reframe: From Treadmill to Journey
Here’s how I’ve come to think about it:
The hedonic treadmill isn’t a bug. It’s a feature. It keeps us growing, exploring, and improving.
The mistake isn’t that we adapt to success. The mistake is thinking adaptation is a problem.
Alternative frame:
You’re not ON a treadmill. You’re ON a journey. The destination isn’t “permanent happiness.” The destination is a life well-lived, full of growth, contribution, and meaning.
Success doesn’t make you happy. But pursuing meaningful challenges, connecting with others, and contributing to something larger than yourself provides a different kind of satisfaction—one that doesn’t fade as quickly.
The goal isn’t to GET somewhere and finally be satisfied.
The goal is to BECOME someone who finds satisfaction in the becoming itself.
I’m a better engineer today than I was five years ago. In five years, I’ll be better still. That journey of growth—independent of titles or compensation—is meaningful.
I’ve helped dozens of junior developers level up. That impact doesn’t fade. It compounds.
I’ve built systems that solved real problems for real people. The satisfaction of that isn’t in the promotion I got afterwards—it’s in knowing I made something useful.
That’s not hedonic adaptation. That’s meaning. And meaning resists the treadmill better than achievement ever could.
The Peace That Comes With Understanding
Once I understood the hedonic treadmill, something shifted.
I still pursue goals. I still want to grow. I still celebrate achievements.
But I don’t expect them to “make me happy” anymore. And paradoxically, that expectation removal has made me happier.
- Got a great performance review? Awesome! But I know I’ll adapt to it. So I savor it now.
- Shipped a major feature? Celebrate! But I know it’ll be normal soon. So I appreciate it while it’s fresh.
- Got a raise? Great! But I know it won’t change my baseline happiness. So I focus on gratitude instead of lifestyle inflation.
The treadmill is still there. I’m just not surprised by it anymore. And in that understanding, there’s a kind of peace.
What achievement did you think would make you happy, only to find yourself adapted and chasing the next thing? How do you find fulfillment beyond the treadmill?