Shane stands on the edge of a cliff. He’s drunk. He’s suicidal. He tells you he doesn’t see a point in living anymore.

This is a farming game.

And somehow, Stardew Valley handles this moment with more care, respect, and emotional intelligence than most “serious” narratives manage.

How do you depict trauma—depression, addiction, grief—without:

  • Exploiting it for shock value
  • Romanticizing suffering
  • Using it as lazy characterization
  • Trivializing recovery

Let’s explore how to write pain respectfully.

The Problem: Trauma as Spectacle

How Media Often Fails:

1. Trauma Porn

  • Graphic depiction of suffering for shock/engagement
  • Camera lingers on pain
  • Audience is voyeur, not witness

2. Inspiration Porn

  • “They overcame their disability/trauma and succeeded!”
  • Person exists to inspire able-bodied/healthy audience
  • Reduces complex experience to motivational content

3. Tragic Backstory Syndrome

  • Trauma exists only to explain current behavior
  • One paragraph of abuse → complete characterization
  • Never addressed, processed, or integrated

4. The Magic Cure

  • Love interest “fixes” depression
  • One therapy session solves everything
  • Character is “cured” after climactic moment

Each of these is disrespectful—to real people and to narrative craft.

Depicting Pain Without Spectacle

The Principle: Respect Over Sensation

The question isn’t: “How can I make this shocking?” The question is: “How can I honor this experience?”

Shane’s Cliff Scene: A Case Study

What the scene does:

1. Foreshadows respectfully

  • Earlier heart events show increasing distress
  • His drinking isn’t comic relief—it’s clearly self-medication
  • You’ve seen him struggling

2. Doesn’t glorify the moment

  • Not cinematically “beautiful”
  • Not romanticized
  • Presented as the crisis it is

3. Shows intervention

  • You call Harvey (the doctor)
  • Professional help is involved immediately
  • You’re part of support, not sole savior

4. Has consequences

  • Shane enters therapy
  • Attends support group meetings
  • Recovery is ongoing process

What the scene doesn’t do:

❌ Graphic depiction of self-harm ❌ Romanticize suicidal ideation ❌ Suggest love solves depression ❌ Make Shane “cured” afterward

Result: Respectful depiction that honors the reality of mental health crises.

Recovery as Non-Linear Process

The Traditional Narrative:

  1. Character has problem
  2. Hits rock bottom
  3. Has realization
  4. Gets better
  5. Problem solved

This is narratively clean and psychologically false.

The Realistic Narrative:

  1. Character has problem
  2. Struggles
  3. Has good days and bad days
  4. Gets help
  5. Improves
  6. Has setbacks
  7. Keeps trying
  8. Manages (never “cured”)

Example: Shane after the cliff scene

Good storytelling would: ✓ Show therapy sessions ✓ Mention support group ✓ Have good days and bad days ✓ Keep his room messy (life isn’t perfect) ✓ Show him helping others later

Bad storytelling would: ❌ Shane is magically happy after ❌ Relationship “fixes” him ❌ Never mention it again ❌ Use it only for dramatic moment

Stardew does the good version. Shane goes to therapy. Attends support groups. Has better dialogue. But his room stays messy. He still struggles. He’s managing, not cured.

This respects reality.

When to Show vs. When to Imply

The Guideline: Internal Pain > External Spectacle

What to show:

  • Behavioral signs (isolation, drinking, erratic sleep)
  • Impact on relationships
  • Attempts to cope
  • Seeking help
  • Small victories
  • Setbacks

What to imply (not show graphically):

  • Self-harm
  • Overdose
  • Abuse
  • Assault

Why the difference?

Showing behavioral signs creates empathy through recognition: “I’ve felt that way.”

Showing graphic trauma creates distance through horror: “I’m watching something awful.”

Technique: The Aftermath, Not the Act

Example: Pam’s alcoholism

Bad approach:

  • Show Pam drunk, stumbling, vomiting, hurting Penny
  • Make it spectacle

Stardew’s approach:

  • Show the effects: Pam lost her job, relationship with Penny is strained, she’s often at the saloon
  • Show Penny’s embarrassment and pain
  • Imply the history without graphic detail

Result: You understand the problem without trauma porn.

Avoiding Inspiration Porn

The Problem:

“Despite their [disability/trauma], they succeeded!”

Implies:

  • The disability/trauma is obstacle to overcome
  • Success is impressive because we assumed they couldn’t
  • Person exists to inspire “normal” people

The Solution: Agency and Normalcy

Example: Linus

Inspiration porn version: “Despite being homeless, Linus is happy!” → Message: Homelessness is okay if you’re positive!

Stardew’s version: Linus chooses to live in a tent. He has agency. He rejects societal norms. His lifestyle is valid, not a tragedy to overcome.

Example: George (elderly, wheelchair user)

Inspiration porn version: “Despite his disability, George maintains his garden!” → Message: Disabled people succeeding is extraordinary

Stardew’s version: George is grumpy, struggles with bitterness, has complex relationship with wife, grows over time. Disability is aspect of life, not his entire characterization.

Grief Without Manipulation

The Cheap Grief:

  • Sad music swells
  • Character cries beautifully
  • One tear down cheek
  • Audience is emotionally manipulated

The Honest Grief:

  • Character goes through motions
  • Some days are harder than others
  • Grief returns unexpectedly
  • No tidy resolution

Example: Spiritfarer

  • Game about ferrying souls to afterlife
  • Each spirit has unfinished business, grief, regrets
  • You help them process, not “solve”
  • Saying goodbye is sad and necessary

The game doesn’t: ❌ Make death beautiful/romantic ❌ Suggest grief ends ❌ Provide easy answers

It does: ✓ Honor each person’s experience ✓ Show grief as love continuing ✓ Let goodbyes be bittersweet

The Technique: Respectful Trauma Writing

1. Research with Humility

Do:

  • Read first-person accounts
  • Understand symptoms and reality
  • Recognize diversity of experience
  • Consult sensitivity readers

Don’t:

  • Rely on stereotypes
  • Assume one story represents all
  • Use trauma for “gritty realism”

2. Give Characters Agency

They’re not:

  • Victims defined only by trauma
  • Broken things to be fixed
  • Objects of pity

They are:

  • People who’ve experienced trauma
  • Active participants in their healing
  • Complex beyond their pain

Shane: Makes choice to get help, attend therapy, keep trying

3. Show Coping Mechanisms (Healthy and Unhealthy)

Realistic characters:

  • Try multiple approaches
  • Have relapses
  • Use unhealthy coping before finding healthier options

Shane:

  • Unhealthy: alcohol, isolation
  • Healthier: therapy, support group, chickens (!), friendship

The progression feels earned.

4. Include Support Systems

Real healing involves:

  • Professional help (therapy, medicine)
  • Community support
  • Time and effort
  • Multiple people, not one savior

Stardew:

  • Harvey treats Shane
  • Support groups mentioned
  • Player is part of support network, not sole hero

5. Let Them Exist Beyond Their Trauma

Trauma isn’t their only trait:

  • Shane also loves gridball, video games, chickens
  • Penny also teaches, gardens, reads
  • Pam also … (okay, Pam could use more development, but she has her job)

People are more than their worst moments.

The Subtle Details That Matter

Stardew’s Thoughtful Touches:

Shane’s room after recovery:

  • Still messy (life isn’t perfect)
  • But has therapy appointment notes
  • Blue chicken poster (found joy)

Penny’s relationship with Pam:

  • Complex, not black-and-white
  • She loves her mom despite frustration
  • No easy resolution

Dwarf’s loneliness:

  • Last of their kind
  • Isolated by language barrier
  • You learning Dwarvish matters deeply

These aren’t plot points—they’re humanity.

Common Pitfalls and How to Avoid Them

Pitfall #1: The Tragic Villain

Trope: “They’re evil because they were abused”

Problem: Implies trauma causes evil

Solution: Trauma explains pain, not moral alignment. Many survivors are kind. Many abusers weren’t abused.

Pitfall #2: The Redemption Arc Through Suffering

Trope: “They suffered enough, now they’re redeemed”

Problem: Suffering doesn’t equal growth

Solution: Show choices during suffering, not suffering itself as redemption

Pitfall #3: The Noble Sufferer

Trope: Character’s trauma makes them wise/pure/saintly

Problem: Romanticizes suffering

Solution: Trauma is trauma. It doesn’t ennoble—it hurts. Growth comes from processing it, not experiencing it.

Pitfall #4: Graphic Detail Equals Authenticity

Trope: “The more graphic, the more real”

Problem: Conflates spectacle with truth

Solution: Behavioral realism > graphic content. Show effects, not acts.

Why This Matters

Because real people:

  • Experience these things
  • Deserve respectful representation
  • Need narratives that honor their reality
  • Benefit from seeing recovery depicted honestly

Because narratives shape culture:

  • “Love cures depression” → harmful expectation
  • “Recovery is possible with help” → hopeful and accurate

Because craft demands it:

  • Lazy trauma writing is bad writing
  • Respectful trauma writing is complex, nuanced, powerful

Examples of Trauma Done Right

Celeste

  • Depression/anxiety as mountain to climb
  • You die constantly (setbacks are normal)
  • “Bad” part of self isn’t destroyed, but integrated
  • No cure, just management

Night in the Woods

  • Mae’s dissociation and mental health
  • No dramatic fix
  • Hometown economic collapse as collective trauma
  • Messy, ongoing, real

Spiritfarer

  • Grief and death
  • Each spirit’s trauma honored individually
  • No rush to “move on”
  • Letting go as gradual process

This War of Mine

  • Civilian trauma in wartime
  • Consequences of violence (PTSD, guilt, grief)
  • No heroism, just survival and its cost

Practical Takeaway

When writing trauma:

1. Ask: What is this serving?

  • Plot device? (Reconsider)
  • Character depth? (Ensure it’s respectful)
  • Thematic exploration? (Research thoroughly)

2. Show effects, not spectacle

  • Behavior changes
  • Relationship impacts
  • Coping mechanisms

3. Depict recovery realistically

  • Non-linear
  • Professional help
  • Support systems
  • Ongoing management

4. Give agency

  • Character makes choices
  • Not defined solely by trauma
  • Has life beyond pain

5. Consult those with lived experience

  • Sensitivity readers
  • First-person accounts
  • Diverse perspectives

The Responsibility

If you’re writing trauma, you’re representing something real people experience.

You owe them:

  • Accuracy over drama
  • Respect over shock
  • Humanity over plot device

Shane’s cliff scene could have been exploitative, graphic, romanticized.

Instead, it was honest, respectful, and ultimately hopeful.

Not because it magically fixed him.

But because it showed that help exists, recovery is possible, and the journey is worth taking.

That’s not just good writing.

It’s care in practice.


Next: The Slow Reveal - Characters who unfold over years, not hours